heh.

yes, i want to be pretty again.

and yes,

i'm gonna take my best look to see you again:)

not just for now, but for always.

you know,
some people, they are afraid to face the fact that they don't wish to be.
and some people who will just do anything to get rid of someone they are afraid of.
but do you know,
when the time you really miss them,
or need to see them.
it's so hard to get back.

some couples,
1st month till 3rd,
in a honeymoon period.
people call it,
love is in the air.
but i call it.
"temporary sweets":D
you know..there are many couples who are scared of losing each other.
so the way of solving it is,
they don't want to think about it.
and they started to ignore.
hmm.i guess that's the best way for them?

and time is a killer.
work is a killer.
why say so?
for example, you can only see your loves one once a week, a month, or a year,
is your love is as deep as the ocean?

working is really good,
to keep you distracted.
and to make you forget the pain of losing someone:)
but when everything is settled,
when you're ready to get some sleep,
you will just simply remember all the memories,
and you even open your eyes,
stare at the ceiling, wish your mind and everything is at blank.

why is it so hard to keep a relationship?
is it maybe that is not the right time?
some people said,
love is a killer too,
it hurt peoples' heart when it can't complete anyone's life.

but when i saw this novel.
it says,

" when i think of you and me and what we shared, i know it would be easy for others to dismiss our time together as simply a by-product of the days and nights spent by the sea, a "fling"that, in the long run,would mean absolutely nothing.when i think of you, i can't help smiling, knowing that you've completed me somehow.there are so much more too.when i close my eyes, i see your face.when i walk , it's almost as if i can feel your hand in mine.those things are still real to me, but where they once brought comfort, now they leave me with an ache."

it's okay you feel the pain when you think of someone,
its okay you feel so scared of losing someone,
it's okay it hurts,
it's okay you cried over someone for so many times,
it's okay that you don feel like letting go.

at least i know,
if you have the will, everything is possible,
and i'll appreciate the every moments,
where i can see you.

and that,
will always in my heart.
now and always :)

i know you want me to forget those memories, i know you don want to hurt me, i know you don want to give any fake hopes, and i know its time to let you go.

its like glass.

i know,
i know its like a glass.
when you break it,
it will just break into pieces.

i know,
i know it's like a glass,
when you try to put the pieces together
it's still have scars on it,
ugly and sad.

i know,
i know it's like a glass,
know that if you don't touch it,
put it at somewhere contented,
it will not get hurt.

but still,
when you touch it,
it breaks again,
and even more uglier.

you know it's not like a car that can fixed.
it's so fragile.
you need days, months, or years to recover.
and even,
you wanna keep yourself busy, to distract you from minding the hole in it,
but the more force you're using,
the more you feel dying.

i know,
i know it has to be fix.
i know it can still feel the pain.

keep moving.

"aiya, just keep moving la!"
"haih..just forget bout this, you can move on."
"never mind, just move on, you can do it."

move on.
keep moving.

so hard to do when you say it at ease.
sure, he is moving,

but where would i be?

each and every time.

just back from school,
felt weary and sad.

i was dizzy,
and almost faint.
my mom gave me wrong medicine,
that was the reason why i looked so weak.

i saw him today at school.
i was happy to see him.
but still,
why i just could not talk to him.
each time i see him,
each time i felt the presence of the hole in my heart,

i wished he could be more direct,
i wished he could be more confidence,
i wished he could be happy.

i want to have a big vacation with my friends;D
i want to have a big party .
of course,
it will happen after SPM.

gosh...
SPM. i think i just can't accept the fact that,
I'm going to get old already!
anyways,
i really hope that if there is faith,
i wish to see him again.
i wish he will always remember me.
i wish if there is miracle..

Frustrated because I can't tell if it's real.
Mad because I don't know how you feel.
Upset because we can't make it right.
Sad because I need you day and night.
Angry because you won't take my hand.
Aggravated because you don't understand.
Disappointed because we can't be together,
but still I'll love you forever.

took it from facebook.,
but still,
so true;D

art is life.

just had my science tuition with ashley and jess;D
hmmm, nowadays reading a novel,
which entitled" Dear john"
i'm reading this not because i'm too bored,
it's just something so special about this book;D

the girl named, Savannah Lynn Curtis.
the guy named, John Tyree.
well, there's this part which i love the most.

it's a letter,
" i stare at the ranch as evening settles in.It's the first night of the full moon,and for me, the memories will come.They always do.I hold my breath as the moon begins its slow rise over the mountain, its milky glow edging just over the horizon.
She pauses and crosses her arms,glancing over her shoulder to make sure no one has followed her.Finallly, she seems relax.And then i feel as if i'm witnessing a miracle,as ever so slowly she raises her face toward the moon.And for the briefest instant,ir almost feels like we're together again."

GIVE PATIENCE READING.
anyway.
i want to dye my hair after SPM.
I can't wait.
and i want to buy a new plaid,
and some dress.

get ready to look different;)
good news huh.
since everyone start saying that i'm pretty;D
hahaha!!!;DD

or i'll put on lens,
so i don't have to wear spectacles?
but it'll probably need time to used to it.
cause to tell you the truth,
i'm not a fan of lens;D

I WANT A NEW SWIMSUIT!!
i can't wait to swim again.
like i want to dive in and feel the water brushing all over my body parts.
and like i'm in the world which is not related to the real one.

there's alot of bad things happened nowadays,
but still i'm strong to get over with.

oh.
and i like Taylor Swift's new song.
Last Kiss.
you should listen to that song,
it's so true and so real,
like i said,
Art is life, where life is art.